Saturday, September 19, 2009
I'm really amazed with what love would do just to make you whole again. Just a simple IM(instant message) from a distant lover will certainly make your day complete. Sometimes love comes to you when you really least expect it to come. Sending of love messages such as "I miss you so much." or just a simple "I love you" on the internet will surely make your heart pound so fast like it's going to burst anytime. We think so much of what the future would bring. We often forget what we have right now. And what simple things can do. It amazes me somehow that these little sending of love messages is just what i need to help me get through the day. A lot of people feel the need to be with their partners. And ofcourse I also feel that way. But for now, I will cherish every message, every lines, this internet's giving me. For now, just for now, sending messages of love and receiving it surely makes my waiting worth the while.
Thursday, September 3, 2009
I've spent my morning today just like the other days for the past couple of months. My right hand holding a cup of freshly brewed coffee and my left hand holding a cigarette. The only difference now is that I didn't go to sleep again even if I've only slept for an hour. Reason? It's the same reason I have for a few weeks now. I'm torn between doing the right thing for me and doing the right thing for the people around me. I cannot argue with the fact that I am in love right now. I am afraid of what the outcome will be. But I know whatever it is that will come my way, I know i can handle it just fine. I'm just hoping that I will not hurt my loved ones along the way. That I cannot handle. But what I feel right now is just too strong for me to take for granted. I'm just praying that everything will be according to His plans. And that whatever will come out after this, all would be for the better.
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
I went home just a couple of minutes ago after watching a movie with mama, and my daughter Louise. While watching "Kimmy Dora", and laughing till my throat hurt, I started thinking. I am happy right now. Then I started laughing again till the movie ended. Lesson??? I could say that I'm really happy and in love right now. And I am for the last 2 months. I am proud of what I feel now. They say that "laughter is the best medicine". But to me, "Love is the best medicine". I know a lot of readers will say that I'm just mushy or feeling that I'm in love with love right now. They can say that as much as they want. But I know deep inside of me that "Yes I'm in love, happy and proud to be in this stage of my life".
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
I've been trying to assessed almost every night every little details of my life. But so far I've seemed to stopped somewhere then realized my mind suddenly went blank. Somehow I can't find enough courage to recall all of it. You can say that I'm scared to face facts that would simply ruined what I've established for myself for the last couple of months. It's really simple for others to just let the past go and move on. It doesn't seemed to work out for me that way. I'm still trapped with my old ME all along. I somehow managed to disguised it for months now without having doubts in my mind. Now, suddenly, those dragging moments are starting to shake me up from where I am right now. It somehow made itself present not in front of me. But it penetrated my whole system.Strange and confusing as it seems but I now feel it everyday. I need to face some aching events of my life to have something to look forward to in the future. This is now my reality. This is what I am supposed to do after all that is if I really want my life to start again. Well, this is just ME...